I actually worked with this cat once who played all those fancy fps's with his kids. He had this eight-year-old who loved Aliens vs. Predator, but this guy actually sat down and played the games with his kids.
That's the difference. Instead of casually buying the games and plugging the kids into the idiot box, this guy sat down with them and discussed the differences between gaming and reality. He asked them questions about how a game made them feel. He asked them if they realized that gaming behavior was unacceptable in the real world.
He monitored their internet and tv/movie content in the same manner. If I were a parent, I would do nothing less. I'm going to actively promote my game to parents on my site, explaining the lack of profanity. (I'm actually using Cromer's template, so if the player uses profanity, the game will boot them) There are other questionable matters within the game, but I'm going to address them during the intro.
I want people of all ages to play my game, but I refuse to alter the content for the sake of censorship. I'll explain the difference between my game world and reality, and I won't deliberately use profanity, but if anyone got upset with the content of my creation, I would feel no sympathy for them whatsoever. I have never purchased or downloaded a game without some real idea of its content.
Those parents who "accidentally" buy their kids ultra-violent games are obviously not paying enough attention. Those kids might get into trouble, but it will be due to their lousy, ignorant, irresponsible parents, not lousy, ignorant, irresponsible games.
Word to your mother!